see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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