Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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