HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
