Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
