nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
PANTIES FOUND
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