weddingsv make me drug and hornr
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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