Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
