Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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