is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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