im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
