Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Life without a bra equals bliss.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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