He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
