I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
