he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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