and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
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If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
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Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
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