Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Two words: blizzard sex
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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