And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize