didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Never let your siblings swipe right.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
