theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
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