So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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