week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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