The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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