How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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