Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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