but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
