first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
