That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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