I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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