this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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