Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
be right there i have to get my cape
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
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