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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You can't motorboat a personality
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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