Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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