Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
