either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You are the jesus of drinking
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
