I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
NoShamevember. You game?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
