And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
3pm strippers are depressing
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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