last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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