wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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