A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
