Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
