If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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