I will die if light touches me.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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