Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
