Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
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If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
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I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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