He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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