i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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