your room smells of hookers.
And success
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
