Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret

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  (310): i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret http://tfl.nu/lkw1
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  (925): View more from California

  I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.

  (916): View more from California

  You're drunk. Make complete sentences.

  (925): View more from California

  It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.

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  (925): I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it. (916): You're drunk. Make complete sentences. (925): It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand. http://tfl.nu/78xl
  Replies (13) Good night (2358) Bad night (547)
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  (328): View more from

  im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?

  (1-328): View more from

  anal.

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  (328): im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is? (1-328): anal. http://tfl.nu/bglg
  Replies (33) Good night (5667) Bad night (1372) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.

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  (760): It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica. http://tfl.nu/vdor
  Replies (23) Good night (997) Bad night (3724) Order T-Shirt
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  (347): View more from New York

  I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.

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  (347): I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there. http://tfl.nu/8ypv
  Replies (24) Good night (3992) Bad night (885) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester

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  (631): OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester http://tfl.nu/vz3v
  Replies (16) Good night (938) Bad night (4001) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.

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  (704): He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza. http://tfl.nu/a4a2
  Replies (8) Good night (931) Bad night (2722) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.

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  (919): I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over. http://tfl.nu/red4
  Replies (3) Good night (721) Bad night (1265) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.

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  (303): Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking. http://tfl.nu/1gdj
  Replies (3) Good night (1704) Bad night (531) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.

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  (815): Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience. http://tfl.nu/8crb
  Replies (8) Good night (1908) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.

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  (321): It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical. http://tfl.nu/ps02
  Replies (17) Good night (2994) Bad night (614)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes. 

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  (406): Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.  http://tfl.nu/b2xf
  Replies (2) Good night (938) Bad night (416) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.

  (1-207): View more from Maine

  That's not what Jesus is for

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  (207): When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck. (1-207): That's not what Jesus is for http://tfl.nu/8stw
  Replies (20) Good night (2305) Bad night (498) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter

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  (760): The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter http://tfl.nu/uanv
  Replies (6) Good night (862) Bad night (391) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.

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  (613): I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students. http://tfl.nu/r17p
  Replies (7) Good night (649) Bad night (287) Order T-Shirt

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