I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Dicks are not precious.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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