I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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