Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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